Don't Hold On To It

I have a friend that is struggling with his relationship with his adult son. The son left the state and has not checked in with his mom or dad since. Needless to say, mom and dad are very worried. They leave texts and voicemails but still no answer. I’m sure many of you can relate to that in one way or another.
As I speak to my friend (the father), listen to, and comfort him, he keeps saying, “I don’t know what I’ve done wrong. I hope God can forgive me.” In troubling situations, it is normal to evaluate and wonder, “did I do something wrong to cause this to happen?” The answer for my friend, you, and I is “maybe.” We are human and have a sinful human nature that we fight against. Sometimes we do wrong things that have unfortunate consequences. If I look at my phone while driving and cause an accident, that’s my fault and my irresponsibility may have harmed someone else as well as myself. It’s best that I own that.
But there are times when we blame ourselves unnecessarily. Did my friend do something to cause his son to leave and stop communicating? No parent is perfect, but he can’t identify anything specific, and I encouraged him to stop trying to “connect dots” that really aren’t connected. We evaluate our actions and take responsibility when appropriate, but we don’t need to own every bad or negative thing that happens as being our fault.

But even more important than that, is when my friend said, “I hope God can forgive me.”
The answer to that is an emphatic “Yes! God can forgive him (and me, and you!)” Jesus has already paid the price for every sin we’ve committed, and God graciously accepts Jesus’ action, instead of holding your sins against you. Just believe it.
In the Bible we read, “Now, brothers and sisters, I want to remind you of the gospel I preached to you, which you received and on which you have taken your stand. By this gospel you are saved, if you hold firmly to the word I preached to you. Otherwise, you have believed in vain. For what I received I passed on to you as of first importance[a]: that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, that he was buried, that he was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures…” (1 Corinthians 15:1-4)
Jesus paid the price, and defeated sin for us. If it’s not true, our faith is in vain. But if it is true, we can have confidence that it impacts our lives eternally.

That is the message I emphasized to my friend. With God, through Christ, there is forgiveness. He can be assured of that. I was in no way saying the rift with the son was his fault, but I did say that anything we do can be forgiven by God. God still dearly loves my friend and his son. God loves you and I, too.

4832 Ponderings:

• Is there something that has been on your mind that you feel guilty about? How do these verses in 1 Corinthians speak to you?
• Is there someone in your life that needs to hear a message of forgiveness from you? From God?
• When God's forgiveness is recognized it opens up the love that strengthens relationships. Can you feel that in your relationship with God? How about other relationships?